Late night madness

I'm so awake.  It's almost midnight and I'm sitting here watching Storage Wars.  My mind is going in a million different directions.  We are within 30 days of having Ma's estate closed.  It's so bittersweet.  I've said all along I just want this finished, but you know, having it being close to closing is tough.  You know, I cried in the parking lot of the bank after I closed her checking account.  That checking account had been opened longer than I have been alive.  
We no longer have her phone number...actually, got rid of it last fall, but I haven't had the heart to dial it to see if someone answers.  I'm scared to.  Yes, I realize it's just a number. It's not a big deal to most people, but when you've associated that number with someone for your whole life, it's not that easy to let go.
I have a hard time letting go of things.  People, pictures, lots of things.  Not a lot of people understand that.  I'm thankful for the ones that do understand that...makes me not feel so crazy.